Awesome weekend. It started Thursday night although work on Friday happened as normal, with a friend's gig and continued into Friday with a BBQ. Saturday was the day of rest and Sunday was a friend's wedding.
And yet now it's practically over i'm a little subdued. When will I enjoy myself this much next? It's a horrible way to live and think and I wish I could avoid it but I guess I'll feel how I feel.
The wedding tangles nicely with the fact that I found out two other friends were now engaged (not to each other, both dudes) in the space of about 72 hours. There's not much chance that that isn't part of the mood.
No matter how much I try to convince myself I don't want a part of all this normalcy I can't really back it up. People need people, and to shy away from a fairly standard life seems to lead down a path of solitude. The idea that friends come before relationships is a crock. It's a feel-good ideal that never pans out in reality. The more I watch my friends continue down this path the less I see them. The two in question have been absolute case studies on this and this was even before they were engaged (again, not to each other). That said, I could make far more effort myself. I tend to wait to be invited rather than do inviting. Similar to my not having ever friend requested anybody on Facebook, just accepted others. And wouldn't you just know this ties perfectly into the fact that I rarely approach women. Fear of rejection and embarassment all around. Awesome.
What else is bothering me? I wonder if I might be diabetic. I certainly pee a lot, but then recently i've been drinking huge amounts of water in the interests of better health. I've considered it before but stopped thinking about it, then I got into a discussion about it with a friend at the wedding who told me she was just under the threshold. It's the first time i've ever experienced anybody seemingly healthy and fit, okay, not having it, but close. Definitely fitter than I am. Can't say that I particularly exhibit the other symptoms, but it seems worth getting checked out. I think it's probably just a tennis ball sized bladder in honesty. If I have somehow hit on type 2 i'll be irritated as I know plenty of people with far worse diets than myself. Day to day mine is, I think, pretty good.
This started out positive. Really enjoyed the weekend. Must try to have weekends like this more. I guess I have two more weddings to attend in the not too distant future so that's good! Self analysis done, I can now go back to enjoying the remainder of the weekend. First though, I need a piss.
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