This was supposed to be done yesterday. Ran out of time, for not particularly good reasons. Quick notes for today.
- The so called devil tries to tempt you when you're alive. Convince you to do the most unspeakable evil. Then, when you die, you go to hell and suddenly the guy's all self righteous? Calling you a sinner? Punishing you for the bad things that he asked of you? For some reason I never looked at it this way before, but it seems like a disconnect that doesn't get addressed by the mainstream devil talkers. Fill me in, devil talkers.
- Guess it was just one note.
1. Food. I am sticking to my rules almost but not quite. I recognise this very clearly as the early winter over-indulgence. I force myself to feel cold and compensate by snacking. Eating does warm the body, as does digestion. It's a poor excuse. I have started noticing calorie counts on various things I eat this last week and I must say a few things are surprising. Given that i'm all about data crunching maybe i'd make a good calorie counter. Note to self to pay some more attention to this.
2. I am watching too much TV this week. That is to say television shows, not films, which I consider a different form of entertainment. It's a one week thing. Next week I will try to get out a bit in the evening for some variety, even if it's just for a walk. Maintaining a drain circling number of chips in fake poker has become an art form now. I'm stuck. As predicted the shorter commute is making it harder to properly listen to podcasts/internet shows. At least 2/3 of the stuff I listen to I insist on paying good attention to. This means not reading from a screen. Driving is perfect for this, but I've lost an hour a day where I did this. I am certainly not complaining. The all knowing idiot Randy Marsh of South Park had a line in an episode of South Park late last season - something about not randomly surfing whilst watching TV. I think the same applies here. It wouldn't be a bad idea to occasionally sit in the living room whilst the laptop sits somewhere else.
3. I feel a little in-shell right now and it bothers me. I know i've been better in this regard at other times in my life and it's hard to understand how one goes backwards in this regard. The only explanation I can find is lack of exposure to people, which is what this was all about. All I can do is try to keep this at the forefront of my mind. I am, and always have been far too concerned about others perception of my intentions. When I am made to look a fool, usually light heartedly I can now brush it off so easily it amazes me, but the fear that precedes that is still with me. Must open up.
4. Working well. Much happier to add a little time at the end of the day. With the new walk to the car park at the bottom of site I haven't yet managed to arrive at my desk on time anyway, but without even trying the time has been made up. There's so much less urgency to get up and driving when home is only 25 minutes away. This gives a better perception to others in the same office who may not know my hours. I've never liked that people have these views, but it's clear they do. Believe it or not, i've heard 9-5ers slating 8-4ers for leaving at 4. I've never heard one shred of evidence that the last hour in the afternoon they work is more productive than the first one I work. In fact, i've heard plenty to the contrary. Still need to get to my set goals!
5. Still happy, so still nothing of note to talk about.
6. I eased myself into weights with the dumbells. On old advice I then waited several days and will get back to them in about 20 minutes time. If i'm doing weights I need to be more careful to avoid injury. I strained a lot of muscles last time I tried and I think this is partly what has been putting me off getting back to it. I also went for a 2 mile walk at the weekend. Not a huge amount of exercise, but I promised myself it wouldn't be nothing, and it's not nothing. Next week the promise is the same.
India is under attack. The time, here at least, is ten to ten.
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